AUGUSTUS:

PILATE:

(Tiredly) Send him in. (Augustus exits and Joseph enters)

JOSEPH:

(Bows) Your excellency.

PILATE:

So, what is it you want to see me about?

JOSEPH:

Sir, your excellency, my name is Joseph of Arimathea.

PILATE:

Oh yes, Arimathea, pretty spot. What can I do for you?

JOSEPH:

Sir, I am a respected member of the Jewish council...

PILATE:

(Impatiently) Yes, go on.

JOSEPH:

I was wondering if it would be possible for me to request the body of one of the crucified prisoners.

PILATE:

(Puzzled) That’s an unusual request. Whose body is it you want?

JOSEPH:

Jesus, Jesus of Nazareth.

PILATE:

Jesus of Nazareth! Jesus of Nazareth! (Stands and starts pacing, getting more and        more worked up) I’ve heard nothing        else all day but ‘Jesus of Nazareth’! I’ve been dragged out of bed at the crack of dawn, I’ve almost had a riot on my hands, I’ve been forced to release a prisoner who is actually guilty and sentence one who isn’t, my wife won’t even speak to me, and it’s all because of this Jesus of Nazareth! I thought that when he was crucified I’d be finished with him! (Calming down) I can’t work out why you Jews wanted him dead so badly. He didn’t seem to be such a big threat.

JOSEPH:

(Quietly) Not all of us wanted him dead.

PILATE:

And now you want his body?

JOSEPH:

Yes sir, his body.

PILATE:

Is he actually dead yet?

JOSEPH:

Yes sir, he is.

PILATE:

(Calls out) Augustus!

AUGUSTUS:

(Entering) Your excellency?

PILATE:

Go and get a report on the situation regarding the body of Jesus of Nazareth.

AUGUSTUS:

At once, sir. (Exits)

PILATE:

(Sits) So, Joseph of Arimathea, you knew this Jesus, did you?

JOSEPH:

Yes sir, I did. I’m one of his followers.

PILATE:

You realise that you risk your reputation, and that you could face death in certain sections of the city for admitting that?

JOSEPH:

It did worry me once, but not any more. I...I just want to give him a proper burial. He        was very special, sir.

AUGUSTUS:

(Enters) Excuse me, your excellency. The prisoner in question is dead. The body has been removed from the cross.

PILATE:

I see. (To Joseph) Well, Joseph, I can’t see any harm in your request. Where are you going to put the body?

JOSEPH:

Sir, I have an unused tomb, dug out of solid rock.

PILATE:

You would put him in your own tomb?

JOSEPH:

Yes, sir.

PILATE:

Very well, some of my men will organise the retrieval of the body for you.

JOSEPH:

I am very grateful your excellency. (Bows and leaves)

PILATE :

(Shaking head) Funny lot, those Jews.

AUGUSTUS:

True, sir.

PILATE:

At least now I am done with Jesus of Nazareth.

AUGUSTUS:

(Cautiously) Err...not exactly.

PILATE:

What do you mean, err...not exactly?

AUGUSTUS:

There’s rumours, sir, talk of him rising from the dead.

PILATE:

Rising from the dead!!

AUGUSTUS:

Yes, sir, rising from the dead.

PILATE:

But who would start a rumour like that?

AUGUSTUS:

Apparently he did. Jesus said he would rise again after three days.

PILATE:

But that’s impossible, no one would believe that!

AUGUSTUS:

The Jewish leaders seem to think they might. They’re outside waiting to see you.

PILATE:

(Groans) Oh no, not them again! What do they want now.

AUGUSTUS:

They want you to make sure that the tomb is secure until the third day. They think that Jesus’ disciples might try to steal the body and then tell people that he has risen.

PILATE:

(Standing) That’s it! I’ve had it with this whole business I’m going to put an end to it once and for all. I’ll give them guards for the tomb and I’ll even put a seal on the stone. I’ll make sure that this is the last I ever hear of ‘Jesus of Nazareth’. (Exits)

AUGUSTUS:

(Following Pilate out) I wouldn’t count on it, sir. I wouldn’t count on it.